Open My Eyes

That moment of fundamental realization, after struggling vehemently against your inner doubts, that, indeed, you do have what it takes to transform your situation and be fulfilled and happy.  It’s all in winning that battle; mastering your mind.  The struggle is worth the thorny path, as it brings clarity and greater insight into the real meaning and truth of life. Your life.  It only begins when you open your eyes and look into the mirror of your heart.

Open My Eyes (To Me)

By Jenny Leigh Hodgins 2009

At midpoint, I am staring

At myself in the mirror

Of my life,

Desperate to see in me

The missing link

That will guide

Me to the doorway,

That bridge across,

The road that leads

To my victory of

reaching my dreams.

Halfway through life

and I am still somehow

Lost or blind or just

completely oblivious

to the truth that is

already inside.

I feel like a dog chasing

its tail in circles,

Dizzy and silly from

my own perpetual spinning.

So infrequent are

My moments when

I am still and silent

in my heart,

Like the moon

that is bravely shining,

cutting her light across the black sky.

I battle and buckle

within my mind,

to settle the noise

and be still like Mt. Fuji,

Solid, strong and standing tall.

Too often instead,

I wilt and wallow,

pace and wiggle,

seeing only shadows

of my youth and lost opportunity.

Crazy insecurity,

doubt of my ability,

blocking my steps to freedom.

Ridiculous illusions,

Obsessions and delusion!

Loss has taught me

all of these are futile,

pointless excursions.

Somewhere in this reflection,

I am there and fully aware

of what life’s meant to be.

Not about wasted dreams

or fleeting time spent,

But in pursuing passion,

Giving one hundred percent,

Offering my whole being

to make a change for good,

to raise the spirit of someone,

young or old, poor or rich,

busy or bored, hurt or untouched.

To inspire capability,

hope and capacity

from within another heart.

None of which will start,

Unless I open my eyes to me.

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